This is an odd bit of writing. In it, I am being as clear as I can and also deliberately obtuse; censorship is alive and real both in the USA and around the globe. And while this is my website, it is hosted; I’ve heard of sites being pulled down. Therefore, I’m being extra, extra cautious.
Rona arrived in early November and stayed for about two weeks. I’m not even sure how she got here – she didn’t show up on foot or in a car.
I had a bit of a scratchy throat, and then BAM! Lethargy hit and didn’t leave for more than a week.
Lethargy is like carrying a weighted blanket around all day. It quite literally weighs you down as if you’re carrying a cement block. Standing up is tiring. Fixing food, cleaning the cat litter, just doing regular things around the house – all exhausting.
I had fever, not bad. I didn’t have breathing or oxygen issues; my sister made sure I had a pulse oximeter and breathed deeply throughout the day. I slept sitting up, or at least supported so I wasn’t lying down.
I tried lying on my stomach (aka proning) but failed as my nose was too stuffed up and runny.
I lost taste and smell. They have both mostly returned but not quite as acute; let’s say a 95% to the previous 100%. I still can’t smell fouled kitty litter or green experiments pulled from the refrigerator, so that’s OK with me.
I took vitamin C, D, zinc, and drank copious amounts of Gatorade and water to stay hydrated. I moved every day…very slowly. I spent long hours reading books and watching YouTube videos.
I quarantined for two weeks and, by then, was recovered enough to venture out into the world a bit. I would have struggled mightily if not for the support of friends and family.
I knew I was improving when the lethargy lifted, like a kite in the wind, like a breeze cooling the humidity of summer.
During this visit, my 16-year-old cat, Nebula was extra quiet. In retrospect, I believe she was actively dying because on November 23 she crossed the rainbow bridge peacefully at home.
She ‘helped’ in the kitchen. She sniffed out freshly cooked chicken a mile away and gobbled chunks of the same in seconds. I miss her sassy tail, ‘cauliflower’ ear, rubbies for days, and that amazing purr.
Miss Nebula was cremated and her remains are in a biodegradable urn. When my 18-year-old Ivan passes, he will also be cremated. I’ll bury all my cats together and plant some catnip and a tree. I’ll be cat-free then, and life will be weird for awhile as I adjust to no pets and no purrs, and no ten-pound cat sleeping on my chest.
HelloFresh, that ubiquitous home meal service, kept me going during the Rona visit. Every week three meals showed up and I had to do something with them. I cooked, I ate, and couldn’t taste much of anything. I kept eating, though, because I knew it was good quality food.
As a darned good cook, I never thought I’d like HelloFresh, but darn it all, I love it. Recently a box went missing and was never delivered; I panicked thinking of all time I’d spend thinking about what to eat, shopping for what to eat, dragging the groceries into the house, putting the groceries away, not using all of the groceries. It was hours!
I have free HelloFresh boxes available if you’re interested. Here’s another tip if you’re interested in HelloFresh: keep your eyes peeled online for discounts. They market aggressively, so surely you can find a better deal than a free box. For example, I started to use HelloFresh around September because there deal for something like ten free boxes or meals over Labor Day weekend.
The Sky Is Blue
To say the least, Rona is controversial; she’s divided the world in so many ways. At the bare minimum, I’m confident someone’s been lying to all the people of the world.
Depending on what you read or hear or watch, wacky theories have come true right before our eyes: these last two years have been like weird disaster movies come to life. It still feels like I’m watching a train wreck in e…x…t…r…a…s…l…o…w…m…o…t…i…o…n.
You can’t see the lying, unless you’ve looked at other things and put the pieces together.
- It’s like transcending the animal, pulling the pieces of your small ego apart, and then reassembling yourself as whole.
- It’s like going through menopause; you come out on the other side utterly changed and utterly the same person.
In the Athens meditation groups back in the 90’s, we’d use the phrase “the sky is blue” to describe a moment of enlightenment – tiny enlightenment.
You don’t see that the sky is blue until you look at it with new eyes. Then, like a flash of lightening, you know and understand. It’s a gnostic knowledge, something you don’t know until you do, and once you do, you have always known.
- You don’t know what childbirth is like until you’ve gone through it. Then you do, and the sky is blue.
- You don’t know what love is until you’ve experienced it. Then you do, and the sky is blue.
Dark Blue Ice Cream
In this post from 2019 I wrote about ice cream being evil as a metaphor for the way we see and experience the world. It is definitely true in this era of Rona:
The hardest work is that which we do on ourselves: that work of uncovering the lies we’ve told ourselves or the lies we’ve been led to believe.
Rona is evil ice cream. It’s an unbearable deep dark blue sky that not everyone is able or willing to view or acknowledge.
So often we see the world in terms of opposites: black or white, yin or yang. yes or no. But my experience tells me the world is full of nuance. There are shadows we are not yet aware of just as there is light and color we cannot see.
I am being very cautious here. As much as I’d like to stick my head up and shout, that’s just not my style, and I believe shouting does very little to change perception.
But here I am saying something, anything. And, if you’re curious and want to go deep, we can talk.
Are You Curious?
“What is it that you understand right now about what’s happening? If I sense some ambivalence…then I’ll say, “Are you curious? Are you interested in learning about some other information or some other viewpoints that you might not be aware of rightDr. Mark McDonald
Are you curious about other viewpoints? Where did you learn to believe what you believe.
In some ways, the roads have already split: jab or no jab. I am not jabbed.
Hidden things, things we choose to not look at, are big and scary: they are the evil ice cream of our lives.
Rona was a pain in the butt, but she wasn’t all that scary; certainly not scary enough to warrant all that’s happened in the last couple of years.
The best I can say is that I’ve become infinitely more comfortable with myself, if that was possible. I have become braver, if even in a minuscule way. Little changes add up to big changes add up to sea changes.
The sea has changed for me.
I haven’t stopped being curious about everything. I keep looking, keep searching. And I still believe in beauty and love and friendship and family.
I believe in the things that really matter. Even if I don’t always show it, I do, in fact, love you.
Once you see, the sky is blue.
(or perhaps it’s purple and my eyes have not yet adjusted to the new color.)
You can’t “unsee” that beautiful, deep blue.
Paradox, possibilities, the endless swirl of the clock arms.
If you’re looking for answers, I have none: they are within you.
If you’re looking for reassurance that you made the right choice, I can only say I am OK with mine.
We must, after all, make peace with ourselves before we’re able to do so with others and the world. This is part of the great work, the work that changes everything.
Tools for the road
- HelloFresh (not an affiliate link.)
- While Rona was here, I loved watching Great Canal Journeys on YouTube. It’s as much about love, partnership, and life as it is about a love of the canals of England and beyond.
- Having lived in London for six months many years ago, I adore watching London Free Tours by Foot on YouTube, too. I keep saying to myself, “Oh, I remember walking down this road” or “Oh, yep, but it looked a little different in the 80s.” Try the rock n’ roll tour or the Stonehenge tour.
- Books I read catalogued on GoodReads and LibraryThing. I try to keep both of them up-to-date; last year I read 65 books. I almost didn’t make my goal of 60 books, so this year I’m shooting for 50.
- The remainder of these links will bring cognitive dissonance to life for you and you and you. Read as much as you are able. Stop when you are tired or overwhelmed, and then read a bit more. There is so much to learn can be exhausting.
- I am on Telegram and have a Telegram Channel where I share curated information that is not available in mainstream media.
- Zelenko Protocol saves lives.
- Catherine Austin Fitts for financial stuff. This interview is a must. She publishes the Solari Report
- Mercola for health advice. So censored he now publishes articles one day, then removes them within 72 hours.
- Robert F. Kennedy Jr’s book is a must read. It is a horrifying look at the AIDs crisis and guess who lead? Sigh; why is this man still in charge? (Not an affiliate link.)
- 6 companies that own almost all the media
- The website NoJabForMe. Start with Part 1.
- Corey’s Digs Investigative Journalism. Start with tools for redpilling volume 6 (yes, redpilling, just like The Matrix)
- Great Awakening Map links conspiracies and more.