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You are here: Home / 2022 / Archives for December 2022

Archives for December 2022

Mission 2022 December

In 2022 I combined lessons from the heart with some –cough cough – goals.

But I don’t like the word goals, so this year has been a quest, a journey, a mission: that for which I am destined.

So how was the year?

  • January – the start of this year’s mission.
  • February
  • March
  • April
  • May
  • June
  • July
  • August
  • September
  • October
  • November

Tarot Cards for November and December

I did a tarot spread for the full year and November’s card was Detail Details reminding me to look at the fine print of anything and everything plus accept things as they are. December’s card was Rock Bottom which encouraged me to surrender and a way will appear asking the question: are you willing to change.

I heard on TikTok that there are three key ages where your body changes. I forget the first one (maybe in your 30s?) but remember the other two were 60 and 78. It’s said that at these ages, your body has noticeable changes, and I have to agree.

I turned 60 last February and gobbled up the chocolate and sweets and tea. By the end of March I’d let go of most sweets and tea and feel better the majority of the time. I still dip my toe into both; err, as I write this on a Sunday, I’ve guzzled down one mug of caffeinated tea and love it. But I can’t subsist on sugar and caffeine alone anymore (and believe me, I’ve done that for a LONG time.)

My body takes longer to recover now, and is more easily injured. Sigh.

So yes, I’m willing to change and learning to change and practicing changing and changing and embracing change and loving change. I’m listening for clues from spirit and and reading the fine print where appropriate.

I liked doing the tarot cards for the year, liked doing the monthly missions so I’m already thinking about 2023. How about you?

Write 250 Words A Day, 5 Days A Week

Not happening. I wrote the first draft of a novel and went to the Lost Lake Writer’s Retreat instead.

Revamp WordStorm Casserole Poetry Book

Not happening. I lowered the price instead

Post Twice A Month On This Website

I did well with this mission and did post twice a month most months. I’ll carry on with this in 2023.

DeGoogle, deApple, deMicrosoft – embrace Linux!

Why? Because Google, Apple, and Microsoft all track your every move online and that’s wrong.

For most of the year, I used my Linux machine most of the time for personal use: checking personal email, watching YouTube videos, checking social media. I’ll carry on with this in 2023.

Have Fun

November and December have been fun-ish. At the beginning of November I was out sick for a bit and grieving the loss of a dear friend.

  • In Spirit Zoom calls have been refreshing. It’s so nice to talk and meditate with friends.
  • Same thing is true for the regular phone calls with the same people.
  • My hair is still colored purple, teal, and dark blue. Every so often while out and about, someone will say, “I love your hair” and that makes me smile.
  • I’ve had several craniosacral massages. Man, I love those so much!
  • I went to the annual Christmas lighted parade. I stood close to a very vocal group of kids who shouted, “Merry Christmas” at the top of their lungs to every passing float. The kids were rewarded with a lot of candy. My reward was laughing a lot and enjoying the lights.
  • It’s not necessarily “fun,” but I was happy to have an easy dental checkup and no cavities.
  • There was Thanksgiving, right? That was a lovely day spent with family.
  • It was fun to hear mom describe the beautiful bouquet I sent for her birthday.

Big Secret Goal #1: Finish the first draft of a novel.

I turned in the first draft of my novel into The Write Practice over Labor day weekend. My reward was attending the Lost Lake Writers Retreat in October.

Big Secret Goal #2: Backyard Landscaping.

This goal is done and dusted! Check out the big secret goal reveal that goes into a lot more detail about what was completed in the back yard this year. I added two pear trees and one dwarf mulberry. At the end of the year I had the same company come back and plant a bunch of Allium, Tulips, and Hyacinths – all which will explode come spring.

What I’m Reading

On GoodReads, I have a 2022 Reading Challenge goal of at least 50 books. I have two more books to go and really, with two weeks, I’ll crush this goal!

  • Living to Tell The Tale by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  • The Miniaturist by Jessie Burton
  • Vanderbilt: The Rise and Fall of an American Dynasty by Anderson Cooper
  • The Book of Lost Friends by Lisa Wingate
  • The INFJ Writer: Cracking the Creative Genius of the World’s Rarest Type by Lauren Sapala.

How About You?

How was your year? What big dreams and projects did you accomplish?

Farewell Michelle

On October 15, 2022, my dear friend Michelle Mather passed away. My world is a little more lonely without her. It was comforting to know that she was out there, living her life, and never more than a phone call away.

Beginnings

We met in the 1990’s in Athens, Georgia at the Pathfinder Bookstore. Pathfinder was a hub for new age activity in Athens and it was run by Gayle Clayton. I suppose new age isn’t the best term anymore, but in the 90s, that’s what it was. You could pick up a copy of a book on meditation or a book on earth changes or have a tarot reading.

There were classes, too, and that’s where where I met Michelle. We were both in Psychic Arts I and II, and then in workshops and more going forward. We were both in workshops with Ron Mangravite, and even now I can hear Michelle asking questions on the recordings of those workshops.

At the time Michelle was finishing up a master’s in social work at the University of Georgia and going through a divorce. We bonded over meditation and music and food and shopping.

Between the divorce and finishing the masters and moving on to her first social work job, she even lived on my couch for a time. We became very good friends. Heck, she and my sister shared the same birth date and year.

Tarot

As I said, we both took several classes at the time that helped us explore and learn about “new age” stuff. In one of the classes that Gayle taught we learned about the major arcana of the tarot. Being a pack rat, I’ve kept notes from that class, so I know that Michelle had the High Priestess and the Hermit cards to explore and explain to the group.

The High Priestess represents intuition, mystery, and sensuality combined with common sense. Michelle was earthy and mysterious and had a load of common sense: she did the right thing even when it was the hardest choice.

The Hermit represents a period of soul searching, self-reflection, and spiritual enlightenment; it can mean seeking (or offering) the services of a counsellor or psychiatrist. Michelle was a social worker and she spent a lot of time alone searching for – well, searching.

Travels

Over the years we kept in touch on the phone and through visits. I visited her in Albany, Georgia, Huron and Lorain, Ohio, and finally in Fayetteville, North Carolina. I never did get to her home in Anderson, South Carolina.

At her apartment in Albany, Georgia, we hit the local thrift store. I found one of my most cherished vintage jackets that day.

Michelle came to my home here in Mount Pleasant, Michigan, and visited when I lived in Knoxville, Tennessee, too. She was at my wedding and was a friend through the subsequent divorce and bankruptcy. We met up one time in Ann Arbor, Michigan, too, and we ate and shopped our way around town.

On two occasions I visited with Michelle at her family’s home in Florida. I vaguely remember a holiday in a brown brick house and then another visit to a white house that had a sunken living room and a moon light. I really don’t remember the details of the whens or the whys and they truly don’t matter anymore.

On one of these occasions we stopped on the long drive from Athens to Orlando at the Spiritualist community at Casa Dega so Michelle could have a reading – she loved having readings.

Her family was warm and welcoming. I remember we had a delicious dinner at a Mexican restaurant one time. Another time we went to breakfast at the Old Sugar Mill Pancake House at the Ponce DeLeon Springs State Park.

I remember visiting Michelle in Ohio and a dinner with meditation friend Deb; there was another time when most of the Ohio meditation group drove to the college town of Oberlin for a dinner at a Japanese restaurant. One time Michelle and I went into Cleveland to visit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. We always went shopping and out to eat.

Michelle loved clothes. She loved matching her nail polish to the color of her outfit. She took great care to be well presented at all times and she loved shopping…

No, It’s better to speak the truth and say that she was obsessed with shopping. I should know, I’m obsessed with shopping, too. And that’s another reason why we were good friends.

Luna’s Love Loaf

In the 90s we participated in sweat lodges and drumming circles near Athens. These were potlucks and I’d bring a casserole or a salad or some new recipe I’d learned. Michelle always brought beer bread.

Michelle loved food but confessed to being a poor cook. One thing she could whip up at the drop of a hat was a good batch of beer bread. Her nickname in Athens was Luna, so beer bread will forever be known as “Luna’s Love Loaf” to me.

The poem “Luna’s Lending Library” in my book The WordStorm even features Luna’s Love Loaf!

Dessert and Mouth Orgasms

On the night Michelle passed away, I felt pulled to go out to dinner. Before the pandemic, I ate dinner out almost every Thursday. Since the pandemic and the arrival of HelloFresh in my life, I haven’t gone out to eat nearly as much. But that Saturday night, I was compelled to leave the house and drive to Stir – one of the best restaurants in town.

Uncharacteristically, I had steak with forest mushroom demi, Dauphinoise potato, with fresh vegetable. And then there was dessert.

I don’t believe Michelle ever missed a chance to have dessert. From the Chocolate Decadence at the Athens Coffee House (where the phrase “mouth orgasm” first showed up) to a lowly cookie, Michelle loved her sweets.

Mouth orgasm – do I have to explain? It’s when you take that first bite of a dessert and it just sends out of of this world…like an orgasm…except it’s dessert. (But don’t limit yourself to dessert – any food can cause a mouth orgasm.)

So the dessert for me on that Saturday night was one that Michelle would have loved. It’s was called a peanut butter honey tart, but that doesn’t suffice. Just imagine:

Peanut butter mixed with sour cream and sugar. Piped into a flaky pastry crust. Topped with whipped cream. Drizzled with caramel and chocolate and honey. Dusted with crushed peanuts.

Oh, just look at this—

It was remarkable and I’m sure my friend would have loved this dessert. Every bite sent me out of this world.

I’ll have to go back and enjoy the dessert all over again, just to be sure. And I’m sad that we’ll never share dessert again.

Music

We both loved dancing to the legendary one-armed blues harmonica player Neal Patman in Athens. Patman routinely propositioned Michelle; she accepted his compliments and graciously turned him down every time. This video is from somewhere in Athens in the mid-1990s – right around the time Michelle and I would have gone to see him.

Another somewhat obscure band we both enjoyed was October Project. If I remember correctly, Michelle actually got to see the band live in Athens – sometime before we met.

Showing The Way

Because of Michelle’s passing and my subsequent illness, I had plenty of time to think about what I would leave behind. Because Michelle’s passing was unexpected, she’d didn’t have time to make a will or even attempt to give away cherished items.

Right now, I’d leave behind a mess of books, paperwork, clothes, and a whole lot of unfinished stuff. I’d leave behind those little secrets that we all hide in the junk drawers in our hearts. I’d leave behind books not written, excuses, hopes for the future, and the little bites that these things eat from our souls.

One time when Michelle and I were talking, she said that she was working her way through my poetry book by reading one poem at a time. That astonished me.

And now, it makes me want to write more. To stop the little bites from eating away the books I haven’t written and to actually get those books written. It makes me want to get my house (literally) more in order, but that may well be a future never written.

I’m happy to have someone on the other side looking out for me, sending me little whispers. I’m pretty sure Michelle’s job is to help me be sure to eat enough and to eat well. She’ll keep me writing and keep me seeking out new friendships. I’ll carry her memory with me on the best shopping trips.

Michelle wasn’t perfect; none of us are. She was a truly compassionate soul. She struggled with weight loss and gain, with money, and with other health issues, too. Mental health and especially depression followed her everywhere.

Despite these, Michelle was incredible at building community wherever she lived. Yes, she lived on her own, but she always found friends and lovers wherever she went. She’d share about road trips to the beach or a birthday celebration on Kelleys Island or meeting friends after work for dinner and a movie or brunch on Sunday. She’d often recount the annual trips to stay with her cousins in Pennsylvania.

Michelle is responsible for connecting the Athens meditation friends up with the folks in Ohio. She moved to Ohio and promptly found a community. Michelle had Gayle go to Ohio to teach and, from those teachings emerged a tightly knit group that later merged with the Athens group.

That blended group had only just begun meeting again on Zoom and, upon learning of Michelle’s passing, we gathered to celebrate her life. She will be missed, and I thank her for showing the way.

Please Remember Me

One night in the 90’s Michelle, Gayle, and I went to see singer-songwriter Loreena McKennitt in Atlanta. Here’s Dante’s Prayer with it’s haunting “please remember me” refrain. I will never forget my friend Michelle.

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Random Quote

Don’t become a great meditator. Become a great human being.

— Stephen Levine

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