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The WordStorm Cover Reveal

At long last, I am releasing a collection of poetry and here is the cover:

This was immediately the cover that pulled me in and held me. Allen Ginsberg’s approach to poetry was ‘first thought best thought’ and -in the case of this cover- that really applies.

There’s something about that lightning and the purple and blue that speak to me. I love that WordStorm is huge. I like the use of different fonts add interest.

And the fact that there’s lightning in the Word and the Storm? I was stunned.

A friend said the cover “shows intensity and passion.”

The lightning is also a nod to a poetic term called a ‘turn’ where, at the end of a poem, there’s often a line or two that take your breathe away or makes you sigh in recognition. I think of turns as itty bitty enlightenments which lightning represents well.

And the fact that I can write a paragraph or so about the potential different interpretations? No doubt, this is the cover that’s perfect for this poetry.

What’s A WordStorm?

I don’t really know, but it has all sorts of implications. It comes from my poem called Starvation:

I’m hungry for a wordstorm casserole, fresh from the oven of my imagination, accompanied by cornbread dreams, steamed dictionaries, hot flashes of insight, and hot fudge recitations.

That sounds like one tasty meal to this word-loving lady!

The Back Cover

The back cover is as understated as the front cover is boisterous. The excerpt is the last stanza of my poem How To Express Yourself More Clearly.

Cover Design

The cover and interior were designed by the talented professional Danielle Smith-Boldt.

You know how when you meet someone you just hit it off? Working iwth Danielle was like that.

She even has a love of poet E. E. Cummings,which brings nothing but music (treble, bass, coda) to this mudluscious, puddle wonderful poet’s pitter-patter h.e.a.r.t.

Check out Danielle’s other work! Hire Danielle either directly from her website or, like me, on Reedsy.

Poems

The poems in The WordStorm cover several decades. There are a couple of poems from high school, a lot from my time living in Athens, Georgia, and several from my earliest years living here in Mount Pleasant, Michigan.

The “hits” from the Athens years are definitely here. When I think of Athens, these poems come to mind: 2Kewl, I AM Becoming One, Be/Learn/Know, Damariscotta, Luna’s Lending Library, On Shooting Trees, Sexrain, and -as mentioned above- Starvation.

There are poems that explore my inner world, look at the outside world of nature, and also those that examine the world and society around me. Heck, the book is more than 100 pages long!

Get The Book

Buy an autographed copy from me via PayPal or Stripe.

Head over to my Amazon author page and buy an ebook or physical copy.

You can also find me on

Library Thing Author Page | Personal Profile | Library
Good Reads Book | Personal Profile

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On Calm in the Face of Fear

So if you didn’t know, I’m a big Star Trek fan. And my favorite flavor is The Next Generation with Patrick Stewart in the role of Captain John Luc Picard which is why, of course, I’m loving the new Star Trek: Picard.

It’s a great story, both broadening the known Star Trek universe and endearing us to the story of Picard and his motley crew aboard yet another starship. This most recent episode was called “Broken Pieces” and it explored the ways in which most of the primary players have been ‘broken’ by their experiences throughout life.

Picard is talking with Rios, a broken former Star Trek officer, after a particularly revealing scene. Picard says, “We have powerful tools. Openness, optimism and the spirit of curiosity. All they have is secrecy and fear, and fear is the great destroyer.”

Fear Is The Great Destroyer

Earlier today I took a friend to the hospital for an outpatient procedure. We were there maybe two hours. She was nervous and her blood pressure was up. At first I reassured her; I’d had the very same procedure a couple of years ago and knew it wasn’t a big deal.

But then I sunk in deeper to myself and remembered my meditation training. I remembered how to literally be that quiet calm in the center of a raging hurricane.

I invited my friend to remember things she loves like the purr of cats and the unconditional love of dogs. She loves the warmth of sunshine and the sound of rustling leaves on a long walk in a nearby park. She loves a hug from beloved family members. I also had her shrug her shoulders as hard as she could and then release with a big sigh. I encouraged her to breathe in deeply, hold it, then release.

These happy memories helped my friend relax and let go of the fear of this minor procedure. I also encouraged her to limit exposure to the news – so much is bad and scary and designed to make us be more fearful. These very simple things allowed my friend to relax into the unknown of the procedure.

Fear Is The Mind Killer

Picard’s words also reminded me of the Litany Against Fear from Frank Herbert’s Dune series of books:

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Got it? Fear is the mind-killer. Fear gets in there and keeps going. Fear is as much a virus as anything – once you’ve got it, it’s hard to get rid of it, and there’s no anti-biotic you can take, no recommended regimen to prevent fear.

Fear is buying all the toilet paper so that there is none for others. Fear is having enough stocked to survive a zombie apocalypse. Fear is listening to the news 24/7 so you don’t miss any important updates. Anybody who’s been following Q or who has tried alternative health methods knows that mainstream media is feeding us lies every day. Those lies breed fear.

Caution is different than fear. Being cautious – buying more than what you normally would buy, but enough to stock your pantry – that makes sense. Being cautious and proactive, fine.

But the crazy panic buying we’re seeing now is part of that fight or flight instinct that (in meditation) we work against. Or rather, you work to recognize when you are running from panic, to pause and reflect very quickly whether this particular thing is a true threat.

To rid yourself of fear, you must work at it, every day and throughout the day. This is not fifteen minutes in the morning and done thing. And one of your best weapons against fear is meditation.

WWG1WGA and Weitko

Bernhard Guenther wrote a long post about fear and shared an excerpt from that post on his Facebook page recently. He and his wife visited the grocery store for their normal weekly shopping.

The energy was eerie. The fear frequency and animalistic survival instinct palpable, the energy of greed and pure selfishness of people hoarding as much as they could into their carts was intense.

With empathic abilities, I feel energy and definitely feel the ‘fear frequency and animal instinct.’ For example, the ‘gauntlet’ of holidays from Halloween to Thanksgiving to Christmas to New Year’s Eve always feels heavy and oppressive to me. I’m delighted when it’s all over.

(I’m not happy it’s January and freezing cold, mind you. More specifically, January always feels lighter and brighter to me. January is a breath of fresh air, a relief after the obligatory merrymaking the four holidays cause.)

But this energy of fear that Guenther wrote about is something altogether different. He uses a Native American term “Weitko” – the virus of selfishness. It’s heavy and oppressive like the feeling of my holiday gauntlet, but there’s more to it. It’s constricting. It’s squeezing. It makes everyone suspicious of everyone else. It’s the opposite of the WWG1WGA philosophy that Q espouses.

WWG1WGA stands for “Where we go one, we go all,” ie, we’re in this together and have to work together and serve each other. Buying all the things doesn’t help your fellow humans, it only helps you.

After I took my friend to the hospital, I went to Target. Later in the day, I went to my local big-box grocery store, Meijer. Both stores felt off-kilter.

Walking into Meijer around 7 pm I heard an employee reassure a man that no, the store had no plans to close; the man had heard rumors that everything was going to shut down, including Meijer.

There was no toilet paper. The TP shelves had signs “Due to the high demand for this product, please limit yourself to five packages.” Canned foods and frozen foods were quite empty; I couldn’t find any frozen kale, so I got fresh and will freeze. I did get a few cans of cannelloni beans because a) I like them and b) there were no chickpeas left.

I bought what I would normally buy if I was filling up my pantry, and a little bit extra. I think I might step up my plans to permaculture the yard, maybe plant more perennial vegetables that can be eaten instead of more pretty flowers that cannot.

But I’m not panicking and neither should you.

Be The Calm

During World War II the British propaganda machine produced a poster intended to help people stay calm. There were millions printed, but it wasn’t widely displayed at the time and faded into obscurity. Then in 2000 a bookstore ‘rediscovered’ the poster and now it’s famous.

Your job now is to Keep Calm and Carry On. Be the calm in the middle of this – and any – hurricane. Hold fast. Do not give in to these fearful thoughts.

Meditation helps, although at first, your brain is a runaway train. Err, most of the time it’s a runaway train. Eventually, it calms down…and then it runs again.

Don’t want to bother learning meditation? Focus on your favorite activities. It’s pretty easy to socially distance if you’re hiking in the woods, far away from this crazy world. Do art. Read. Go out and work in your yard, in your garage. Work on a project you’ve wanted to but never got around to.

Messy Nessy Chic has a creative list of things you can “do to not bang your head against the wall’ while stuck at home indefinitely. If only I had more magazines and so on to collage my bathroom wall…

Listen to some binaural beats. The creator of the video below explains that binaural beats are at 528 Hz which is also known as the miracle tone, or the love tone. It allows for positive transformation, as well as DNA Healing and repair.”

I just think they feel good.

And definitely turn off the news. Perhaps listen to the news twice a day. Turn off the 24/7 feed and treat the news like it’s poison.

P.S.

For me, not posting on a regular basis is more because I’m not moved to post something. I really tried hard to post once a week, but my heart’s not in it. Now when my heart is in it, a post like this rolls out of me with little or no editing.

P.S.S.

I finally faced every fear I’ve had about self-publishing and am working towards publishing a collection of poetry. These are things I’ve written over the years, and they’ll be all together in one volume. Looks like it will be ready for the whole world sometime in April. One of these days I’ll change the website around so it’s a little more writer and a little less life coach.

And if you’re hungry for a little poetry now, check out this or this.

Up The Mountain

There’s an old Chinese proverb that goes “There are many paths to the top of the mountain, but the view is always the same.”

Of course there are multiple interpretations of that, and this one from Hinduism is on my mind today:

There are hundreds of paths up the mountain,
all leading in the same direction,
so it doesn’t matter which path you take.
The only one wasting time is the one
who runs around and around the mountain,
telling everyone that his or her path is wrong.

Put another way, there are many paths up the mountain and only one truth.

That truth is love.

Or, the best way to express that truth is through love in action. You know what that feels like, yet explaining ‘love’ is like trying to slap a definition on a blue sky. You can’t make someone see blue when all they see are clouds and rain.

But this is not supposed to be a long-winded essay today. It’s a check-in, a way to let you know that I am still here, walking up that mountain. It’s the same mountain I’ve been walking up for some 25 years now – that’s about the time I identify as the official start of my spiritual journey.

It’s probably been longer, but who’s counting?

Who’s counting a belief in reincarnation that suggests hundreds or thousands of different lives and just as many years?
Who’s counting this soul’s multiple simultaneous incarnations?
Who’s counting multiple lifetimes happening simultaneously through multiple dimensions, time, space, etc.?

There is no time, so there is no counting, and all is now.

Still Climbing

At the start of the trail, the walk is always easy. Wide, smooth, well-trodden, and downright fun. As you rise up (as good a metaphor as I can muster this morning) the path is strewn with all manner of rocks, sticks, fallen branches. It’s steep and uneven and sometimes scary. It’s one obstacle after another because everything in life is the path.

I’m discovering that I have a great need to strip away non-essentials, to once again let go and let go and let go.

I’ve spent the last few years accumulating stuff – literal things like clothes and cookbooks, but also mental stuff like Reiki, QHHT, life coaching, mindfulness, and business ideas.

And I’ve gotten so turned around on the path that I think I have 10,000,000 things do to and am tired of 9,999,999 of them. I’m tired of grasping, wishing, dreaming, tired of thinking about and tired of not doing.

I’m tired of taking on things (Reiki, QHHT, Life Coaching, Mindfulness, business, clothes, and cookbooks) and having little to show — other than a PDF certificate and a large pile of cute clothes and vintage cookbooks.

Paint The Basement

My life coach asked me what I needed to do next to move along the path. I said, “paint the basement.”

I want to focus on the here and now and on things that make a tangible difference for me.

I could get all symbolic on how painting the basement equates creating a solid foundation on which to build my future, but really, there are enough metaphors out there for me to use on another day.

Today, I’m pausing at this grand turn on the path of my life.

Sidebar

(A sidebar is a short story or graphic accompanying and presenting sidelights of a major story. It’s a deviation from the main thread or idea presented here. So you can ignore this part if you’d like.)

I’ve unfollowed a lot of people and pages and businesses on social media. Each platform seems more like a bad joke. Social media wastes time and focuses energy on wants and desires over true connections.

And yes, I know people who use social media for true connections, but the majority of it seems fake and fake and fake. But yet I don’t want to cut the social media cord completely.

Frankly, social media manipulates that deep desire to spy on people. And deep down, that’s what it’s about – jealousy about that life lifestyle or activity or possessions. And in turn, that jealousy becomes fear of missing out (FOMO.)

I’m doing my damnest to seek JOMO (joy of missing out) but there’s the whole “missing out” part of both of these acronyms that bothers me: what exactly is missing from me that needs to be found and fixed?

Keep Climbing

Of the nonsense online, one blog stands heads, fingers, knees, and toes above the others at the moment for me: Schrodinger’s Other Cat.

The posts are usually short and funky, the comments thought-provoking, and the metaphysical humor 100% on point.

It’s definitely not for everyone. But it’s a cozy little box in the corner of the interwebs for consciousness naps and meows that I thoroughly enjoy.

Lately “the cats” have asked readers to experiment with a saying from a student of A Course In Miracles (ACIM.) My experience with this saying was quite interesting, so I thought I’d pass it along.

Take this saying and try it out on anyone and everyone. Include yourself, and those you’re struggling with or have struggled with in the past:

Boss pissed you off? Say the saying!
Cut off in traffic? Say the saying!
Annoying relatives? Say the saying!
Thinking of your ex? Say the saying!
Nosy neighbor? Say the saying!
Burned your dinner? Say the saying!
Former frenemy in your thoughts? Say the saying!
Pesky pests eating your tomatoes? Say the saying!

I work at holding that person in my mind’s eye and gazing into the person’s eyes. Then I say the saying (it’s not a mantra, but, if it’s easier to remember it that way, so be it.) I wait and see how it feels.

That’s the key here — how does it feel? Most people I can do one recitation and feel some change or release. Some folks take two, three, four or more recitations. You may need to stop, collect yourself, and really get in touch with the compassionate part of yourself that loves beyond love – unconditionally.

You’ll know you’re finished saying this for the person because there will be a clear release. For me, it’s usually quite subtle like a gentle sigh or stomach muscles releasing.

Notice any thoughts that appear while you’re doing this. It could be something like “leave me alone” or “thank you.” You might say “whew!” when you’ve finished with some, and smile with others.

Feel free to change the saying around to make it work for you. For the word “Brother” I’ll often say something like “brother, sister, father, mother, source, god, goddess.” And I found that I had to repeat “all is forgiven and released” over and over for some people.

This is one way of being love in action. It is a way to walk your path up and around the mountain of your life with as much love in your heart as you can muster.

Regardless, try it out and let me know how it goes.

You are perfect

immortal spirit

brother

whole and innocent.

All is forgiven

and released.

The Tapestry of Ordinary Life

So I’m on my third, fourth, or maybe fifth time watching the entire seven-season run of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

(I live alone…Amazon Prime and I are good friends.)

The fifteenth episode of season six is called “Tapestry.” And here’s a quick synopsis because it’s important to understand the essence of this episode for all that I have to say about my life right now.

Picard’s Regrets

Main character Captain Picard is rushed to the Enterprise’s operating table where he dies because his artificial heart has stopped. He’s given a second chance at life by an omnipotent character named Q.

In their conversation, Picard admits he regrets much of his younger life because he was arrogant and cocky. This intrigues the omnipotent Q, who allows Picard to “pull on this thread” of his life to see what happens.

So Picard ‘pulls’ on a very specific thread in his life: the events that led him to have an artificial heart. He returns to his early 20s, and we see him attempting to date multiple women on one day.

More importantly, we see the events that led up to him starting a bar fight which led to his knifing, which led to the artificial heart, which has caused his ‘death.’

Picard’s Boring Life

And while it’s funny to see an aging Picard playing out that incident with his youthful friends, the part of the ‘tapestry’ I’m most interested in is when Picard is placed back onto the Enterprise. This is the fleet’s flagship, and of which he is captain – but not in this ‘new’ reality.

Instead, someone else is captain and Picard is a Lieutenant Junior Grade Astrophysics Administrator – or some goofy title like that.

He goes to the starship’s bar, Ten Forward, and asks for an employee review.

It doesn’t go well.

I Am That Picard

Picard is so very, very wrong about that quiet life. It was not dull and tedious – it only seemed that way through his eyes.

It really bothers me (and bothers plenty of other people) that this normal life is portrayed as if it’s horrible.

What the heck is wrong with a “normal” life? I am that Picard. My day-to-day life is pretty darn dreary and repetitive.

I wake up.
I have some tea.
I go to work.
I come home.
I feed the cats.
I read a book.
I watch yet another episode of Star Trek.
I have dinner with a friend.
I clean the litter boxes.
I plant some flowers.
I buy cute clothes at thrift stores.
I meditate a little here and there.

And that’s it, folks, there’s very little excitement in my normal, everyday, ordinary life.

Or is there?

Ordinary Extraordinary

My blogging friend Beth Ann Chiles writes nearly every day at It’s Just Life: Finding the Extraordinary in the Ordinary. As the title suggests, the blog covers many aspects of Beth Ann’s everyday life: family, friends, devotionals, teapots, travel, and more.

In chronicling her life, Beth Ann elevates the everyday into something that approaches art.

Or maybe it is art, I don’t know.

But I do know that she’s created a cozy spot on the internet where I always feel welcome, and where there’s probably a pot of tea nearby.

I also envy her many trips around the world – and the fact that she’s at the beach again this week.

But the thing that gets me about Beth Ann’s blog is that her “ordinary” life is not Picard’s dreaded “dull and dreary.” It’s magical.

There Are No Dull and Dreary Lives

More to the point, my life isn’t dull and dreary. There are these amazing high points:

Living in London just after college.
My first apartment in Toledo and the writing and modeling friends.
Life in Athens with more writing and meditation friends.
Living and working at the Omega Institute for Holistic Studies.
That amazing trip to Peru a few years ago with magical waterfall experience.

All I have to do is start making a list, and I’ve had a lot of amazing experiences.

To be sure, there have been lows, too.

Filing for both bankruptcy and divorce in the same year was horrible.
Getting fired from a job wasn’t fun either, but retrospect shows me the journey from that point to now.

We all know life isn’t about the high or the low points. Life is a sum of all of those points and finding that middle road where all is well for us.

Getting Busy

It would be easy to argue that Picard’s view of that “dull dreary” life is flawed. Through the magic of storytelling, he’s thrown into that life without the benefit of the experiences that led him to the ‘end’ of the journey. Surely there have been wonderful things happen in that Picard’s life.

Unlike that Picard, though, you and I have the ability to stop and look back and the various twists and turns that led us to here and now. Having done this recently, I am at a still point with being the “dull and dreary” Picard.

Not long ago, I wrote about how I thought that if I “that if I just put up a pretty website and got busy with business-like things, my life would change.”

Unpacking The Story

Unpacking that sentence and the story behind that “still point” for you a little more, I was obsessed and enamored with the idea of having a business.

The idea of one – not the reality. I had grandiose ideas about what running a business by myself meant and had convinced myself that being busy = business.

In my mind, I needed to be as busy as possible because surely that would make my business succeed, right?

But the more I observed this desire to have a business, the less it felt real. It didn’t have meaning and purpose and felt terribly hollow.

So I let go of that desire. It really was that easy.

In writing one morning, I asked what I really needed to do. And the answer had nothing at all to do with running a business.

Stop Forcing Success

If you want coaching, I can do that. If you want writing, I can do that. But I’m not going to run around and try to force success to happen anymore.

One other thing I’ve realized is that all of the amazing things in my life came relatively easily.

Yes, I had to work at them.

But those things came together in a way that I can only describe as magic or happenstance or fate. The less I fight with life, the more it flows. And I know that miracles of all sizes happen every day when you least expect them.

So now my life is back to a normal, ordinary, gentle hum.

Does your life hum? Do you see the magic?

Writing & Mindfulness

Not long ago I told someone that I was interested in the intersection of writing and mindfulness. The phrase just rolled off my tongue and – to be honest – I wasn’t quite sure what I meant.

A female hand holding a pen and writing. The words "writing and mindfulness."

Full disclosure: I am an Amazon Affiliate. If you click on a link and buy something (even if it’s not the particular book,) I receive a little compensation.

At first glance, mindfulness and writing have zero commonality. But a closer look reveals the “intersection” – that place where the two meet.

The easiest way to experience this intersection is by writing by hand. There comes a very obvious transition from complaining and list making to what feels like taking notes from god – spirit – source – whatever. And it’s clearly not you thinking, because words flow freely and are deftly organized.

For me, this “space” of not thinking is where my best writing comes from.

This transition between everyday consciousness to something else is nothing new for writers. Natalie Goldberg’s beloved Writing Down The Bones touches this space, as do Julia Cameron’s “Morning Pages” exercise. Both help you move from everyday and into this other type of writing. Here’s how to recognize that space:

Everyday Writing

Complains
Makes to do lists
Acts like “The Editor” and criticizes
Intellect talking to itself
Feels like you’re working at writing
Your handwriting is practiced and perfect

ExtraOrdinary Writing

I’m not writing, I’m taking notes from god.
Flow and lack of effort
The words move through me
It writes itself
Handwriting is loose and playful

When you enter into the stillness of not thinking, your writing changes. For me, if I do nothing for long periods of time, this “ExtraOrdinary” writing comes naturally. It becomes -if you will – the new every day. The question is how to get these extraordinary states to come into your life more often.

I daydream. I stay quiet and let cats sit on my lap for a long time. I don’t run off and get busy with a to-do list. This doing nothing keeps the connection between rigid consensual reality and source/spirit/no time firm. And the more you move back and forth between these two ways of being, the easier it becomes to adapt to the timelessness of not thinking.

The “lack” of structured time is a terrifying thought for anyone caught in 9-5, appointments, and to do lists. By daydreaming and not doing on a regular basis, you acclimatize yourself to this sinuous approach to life. I believe it is the natural way to be in the body.

Abandon Thought

We love thinking and linear thought. But there are other ways of being in the world that are utterly devoid of thought and that are profoundly natural and transformative.

On page 12 of Mindfulness, Bliss, and Beyond, Ajahn Brahm gets straight to the heart of the matter of this problem of thinking and commenting on everything. He calls it “inner speech.”

…inner speech does not know the world at all. It is the inner speech that spins the delusions that cause suffering. Inner speech causes us to be angry with our enemies and to form dangerous attachments to our loved ones. Inner speech causes all of life’s problems. It constructs fear and guilt, anxiety, and depression. It builds these illusions as deftly as the skilled actor manipulates the audience to create terrors or fears. So if you seek truth, you should value silent awareness and, when meditating, consider it more important than any thought.

Inner speech gets in the way of good writing. Learn to abandon inner speech, so your writing moves into that ‘other’ extraordinary space.

Writing morning pages – aka stream of consciousness or writing whatever comes into your head – helps you make the leap between here and there.

Meditation takes you the rest of the way.

But that’s another story.